"Adorable, Adeola" she heard her voice again as she wiped her face with a big swab of cotton wool. She wished the scar of Soji's finger nails were no more obvious but she had to agree it had healed fast enough after the fight. It was her sister-in-law who had visited and she didn't want her to know that her husband had 'mutilated' her recently. She would be disappointed after the last time when Soji prostrated in her presence and held her feet that he would never 'teach her a lesson' again for checking his phone.
As Clara's voice drew nearer, she knew she had to be fast but as she sprang up from the stool and glanced again at the mirror feigning excitement with a 'yes', she discovered that she couldn't pretend. She broke into tears. Clara finally opened the door and just took her into her arms.
"I knew you would want to cover it. I saw the scar immediately I came in...." Clara finally said. "He beat you again?"
Adeola gave a weak nod. "Clara, I guess its all my fault" She admitted as if she remembered something.
"Now, don't blame yourself for doing whatever you did to deserve this. Soji can not keep abusing you and you end up blaming yourself. No matter what you did, you are not a slave and should not be treated as such..." she murmured "moreover, I'm very sure what you did is insignificant..."
"You don't understand, Clara"
The other lady looked intently at the cry baby this time wondering what she had in mind. She had always known her brother, he had always been a casanova. She remembered when he first brought Adeola home to their parents and introduced her as his fiance. She pitied her secretly because of the life ahead of her -with Soji. She tried ted to ask where on earth they met but she was wise not to let her know why she was so inquisitive and the Adorable Adeola had no idea that she was only asking why she had to fall into Soji's hands. She remembered girls like Jasmine, Tolu, Joke, Chidinma, Ebere and Tina. They all left because Soji was always cheating, lying, slapping, scolding.... oh but people like Tina can never be forgotten. She made a scene at their family house that left a scar on Soji's skin. (Good for him!) She also remembered Folake who Soji deceived even until after his wedding date was fixed and she hoped the poor lady survived the heartbreak. What bothered her most was what they all saw in him. No offence but Soji was just a regular guy. Nice looks, always well-dressed, tall, eloquent, classy...(.ask me, what else do ladies look out for?)
"I shouldn't have married him" Adeola confessed. Clara jolted back from her thoughts. She was bewildered but she decided to let her land.
"Soji was a sweet talker, romantic ladies man. I bet that caught me. He was in a serious relationship back at school and I was the 'fling'. I always played along when the other chic was present but he always promised it was me he would marry...and here I am married to him today.... I wish ....." she sobs again. "I should have known."
"You mean you knew all along that he had a stable relationship?" Clara asked. She wanted to say 'and you kept dating him?' but she refrained.
"They were in a stable relationship. You know, Soji is the gentle guy with so many friends -mostly ladies he claims not to have anything with. He had always been having girls around him. I should have known"
"If you are saying this, does it mean you didn't want to have a settled future? You mean you didn't know that even if he marries you issues like 'women' will always cause a row?"
"I was stupid...I was not thinking deeply....all I wanted to do was hook him. All I wanted to do was 'I will be the one to end up with him, he will jilt others for me... you know...I didn't want it to end like most school relationships...I should have thought of the future..."
Clara was getting angrier.
"I remember when he called me that we were now free to start our relationship openly because he had called it quits with the other girl. I was sooo happy. I never even stopped to think that someone who could be so heartless to a lady who he claims had been faithful to him for three good years would someday hurt me too. According to him, Folake was homely, loyal, faithful and intelligent but I kept wondering why he prefered me to her but I couldn't ask but now I know why..."
"Why?" Clara snapped.
"...Maybe because I was naive, stupid...I'm sure Folake never got to know about his escapades. She was in for a serious relationship, she wasn't playing like me who knew he had other girls and was stupid enough to act neutral whenever Folake was around..... He needed to settle with a dummy, not someone who could make him fall on his knees or challenge his actions like I'm doing now....and which has caused me so much pain."
"Hmmmn..." Clara heaved a deep sigh. She understood Adeola's plight. Many girls today are just too anxious of having someone in their lives that they cover their faces to the truth just because they are desperate. They 'take shit' just to get married and after marriage, they suddenly want a change. They live the illusion of a faithful man and expect the fruits of a good relationship despite the faulty foundation. Clara smiled lightly and Adeola wondered what was on her mind. She cast back her mind to her past with bitter-sweet memories and stole a glance at her own beautiful, finger and saw the ring James gave her. She would marry him again and again.
"What is that? You seem carried away"
"Nothing much, dear..."
"You are thanking God for James, I know." Adeola retorted.
"oh...no...yes....okay, I'm sorry, no offence..." She jolted that her phone fell down from her laps and she picked it briskly. "I hope you understand that I didn't mean to spite you."
Adeola shoved her hand.
"That's nothing. James is a man to be grateful for, isn't he? You waited patiently for him and here you are in a blessed marriage..." Adeola said admiringly.
Clara was grateful for waiting. Though it seemed she married late but it was worth the wait. Some years back, she had started to feel she had a spiritual problem but now, she understood that it was just a process. Now, she had peace in her home, lovely kids under her care and a husband made for her alone. Her friends said she was too strict. Some people felt her standards were too high but now, she could see another woman lamenting. She remembered her last relationship before the long break that led her to her 'God send'. Everyone blamed her for not forgiving Michael whom she had dated for four years yet was just pretending and wasting her time another chance. Unknown to her, he had other 'stable' relationships with other girls who were also believing that someday, he would marry them. She was only lucky to discover on time and though she cried and cried, she had to let go (painful o). She wondered why she would stay in a relationship just because the guy is promising marriage and yet indulging in other women's hearts. At a point she felt may be she was too mean like people told her especially when it seemed the right guy was not in view but thank God for patience. Thank God that she didn't compromise. Thank God that she didn't lower her standards just because she wanted to bear a man's name. She really was thankful.
Now, back to Adorable Adeola, she was full of regrets for seeing an impending danger and yet going into it.
People should realize that marriage is forever -or so is it meant to be. Going into marriage is not like lodging in an hotel. In an hotel, you are a new customer once you return, you may never even have the last room you used but in marriage, even if you check out, your footprints will always be there whether you have children together or not.
Send me your comments and questions through the blog but for a more personal conversation, mail to tlecounsel@gmail.com. To join our list of clients for counselling on all issues of life; from marriage, career, health, lifestyle and bugging mind questions, request a client form from thesame address. Be Blessed.
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